Can Moral Statements Be True? Part Two [essay]

*

**

***

As I wrote Part One of this thought piece, it began to dawn on me that what I was doing was looking for moral standards to guide my own behavior.

I tried several approaches to answering this question: Can moral statements be true (or false, for that matter)? I concluded that one cannot corroborate or contradict statements like these:

• Profiting from the suffering of others is wrong
• Telling the truth is right
• Treating others fairly is moral
• Failing to abide by agreements you have voluntarily made is immoral
• Kindness to others is good
• Greed is bad
• You should not take credit for the accomplishments of others
• You should take responsibility for your own actions

and so on, and so forth.

Facts are not enough alone to prove whether or not such moral statements are true or false.

6

Now here's another approach: What if all the world's religions, at all times throughout human history, agreed that a certain behavior is good and its opposite is bad? If all religious traditions were in favor of this good behavior and opposed to its opposite, wouldn't such enduring and extensive accord be a sufficient basis for saying this behavior is good in fact and its opposite bad?

Well...No. That would be like saying, All believers in an almighty and all-knowing deity have agreed about that God's moral standards, so therefore moral statements deriving from these standards are "true." But - for one thing -  we know there are people who do not believe in any supernatural being. Can we truly say that atheists - by definition - are immoral?

One would think we cannot. The most one could credibly claim is that all atheists are spiritually deficient, not morally flawed; that is, their beliefs may be lacking, by definition, but their behavior might still be moral, which is a social and behavioral concept rather than an intellectual or spiritual one.

It is correct that some people (including even, we have to note, some believers) behave as if they did not hold themselves to any moral standard, implying that for them, no morality exists at all. If atheists were logically consistent, would they all be amoral in this way?

In other words, is this a true statement: "It is immoral (or amoral) not to worship God"?

I don't see how we can reasonably hold this position. One could, for instance, rigorously follow a "moral code" just because he or she thinks that's the right thing to do, even though nothing in the world around us and nothing supernatural makes its moral statements true.

Claiming that a statement deriving from a moral standard accepted by all religions is true, would not be unlike saying that in this state or that state, a certain behavior is legal. Being legal, though, as we know, is not the same thing as being moral. The mere fact that a majority of all the world's people, throughout all history, may have thought it moral or immoral to do a particular thing is no guarantee that this claim is not mistaken: truth is not determined by a vote, even if the vote is unanimous. (Wide agreement would make a moral principle important, but not "true.")

7

Maybe it's worth pointing out that there are facts that are relevant to moral statements. People living in a society where individuals routinely act unselfishly might be shown to be less inclined toward political upheaval than others, for example, or to feel more loyal to their employers, or even to live longer. Any of those matters of fact, if they should exist, would show us that unselfishness was beneficial to society in certain measurable ways. But they would not make the statement "Selfishness is bad" true, only useful.

Some say - as another example - that it is immoral to bring into the world an infant when it is virtually certain that the mother cannot provide for the child's well-being. In such an instance, the facts demonstrating this high probability are relevant to the moral question of artificial birth control. But they don't prove that "Birth control is good" is a true (or a false) statement - not good or bad, only rational.

Although facts are or may be relevant to moral issues, that is, they are not determinative in themselves of "moral truth."

8

So, then: expressions about right and wrong can be neither corroborated nor contradicted by facts, and there is no independent or absolute moral standard that can be used to prove the truth or falsity of a moral claim.

When we say -

• Torture is wrong, or
• Having sex with someone else's spouse is immoral, or
• Treating people badly just because they are different from you is wrong, or
• Showing respect for other people even when they disagree with you is good, or
• Justice is better than revenge -

when we make such claims, we are saying that we like or don't like the matters identified; we admire justice and showing respect even for those who disagree with us, and we deplore revenge and adultery. Statements about what a person's moral judgements are may be true or false, but it would not be "true or false" to say that seeking revenge - for example - is immoral, only that the individual thinks so.

But that seems disappointing, doesn't it? We don't feel it is enough to say, "I admire unselfishness and I despise greed," or "I would not harm others if I could avoid it and I will always tell the truth." (Why should someone else care what our moral principles are anyway, anymore than our preferences in pop music or classical literature?)

Saying merely, "I believe all people should be treated fairly" or "I despise those who exploit the ill fortune of others" - seems to reduce important moral statements to the level of "I like broccoli" and "Opera bores me." I can make the claim, "It is immoral to want for myself something I deny to someone else," but in doing so I am only expressing an opinion, rather than accurately describing the world ... and this seems less momentous.

It just seems these days that expressing an opinion is less significant than explaining what is or is not factual. What I think, we seem to feel, is less compelling than what I know. My personal values are considered less consequential than my understanding of people and things outside myself. 

Moral values cannot be proven either true nor false, which makes them seem trivial.

9

Now, to recall the sage observation of that preacher in my sixth grade class, is there any kind of "truth" we can credibly claim for moral statements?   Dr. Smith - I assume - was speaking of the Bible's truth as being sometimes and in some ways that kind of truth one finds in myths, which to many of us do seem to accurately describe human nature and human hopes and dreams, truths - that is - which correspond to such a comprehensive reality that to limit their reference to mere matters of easily observable facts would be to miss their point and misunderstand them.

Because of the complexity and comprehensiveness of their reference, statements of this kind of "truth" may not be subject to corroboration or contradiction but may still be considered true or false.  Might we find a truth or falsity of a similar kind in moral statements?

And if so, would morality seem more important to us? Well, since we in our times don't respect mythology very much - even sometimes using the term "myth" to mean "lies" - this approach seems interesting (since moral claims, like myths, refer comprehensively to all people at all times) but not the compelling solution we are looking for.

10

We can make true (or false) claims about moral statements, like these -

• Treating others fairly is beneficial to all society, or
• If everyone sought to profit from the suffering of others, many would be harmed, or
• Pursuit of riches is not deeply satisfying long-term, or
• Torture does not reliably produce accurate testimony, or
• It is unwise to think you are more important than others.

These are complex and comprehensive statements - about wisdom, happiness, what benefits society, and such - and it is conceivable that enough experience or observation or historical research would prove or tend to prove their truth or falsity.

But is it right to be efficient, humble, happy, or socially beneficial?  How could we know, for sure? 

11

Let's get back to moral statements, not statements about the efficiency or practical value of certain behaviors but moral statements like these:

• Punishing an individual for the wrong-doing of his or her ancestors is wrong, or
• Honoring the individual who behaves morally even in trying circumstances is good, or
• It is bad for a society to deny equal opportunity to every one of its members, or
• It is right for political leaders to work together to promote the general welfare,

and so on -

Rather than seeking to show how these and other similar moral values are based on divine authority, or widespread agreement, or on reality itself, why can't a person just be satisfied by convincing himself or herself that X is right and Y is wrong, or that A is good and B is bad, or one should do this and should not do that? 

It is true there will be differences of opinion about such statements; so for us to live productively and amicably together, we need to find ways we can use to show why or why not to accept the value of guiding our behavior by one or by groups of such moral statements. 

In other words, the greater good for all will be achieved more readily the higher the degree to which all of us are willing to guide our behavior on the basis of the principle that Treating others as we would want them to treat us is good, and Behaving selfishly is bad, and It is immoral to profit from the suffering of others, and It is moral to take responsibility for one's own actions (and so on).  The more we can approach agreement on what is moral and what is not - not on the basis of claimed divine authority, not on a claim that one value is true and another is false, and not primarily on the basis of practical utility - but simply because we think it is right. The sooner we reach that point, the better for us all.

What can be brought to a discussion about whether or not is it right to seek to deny to someone else what you wish to have yourself (for example)?  How could we explain why we think greed is immoral and lying is bad? And so on.  What's relevant?

12

The relevant facts about the moral guide - when it is possible to learn them - are worth knowing, although they will not prove the validity or invalidity of the moral statement.  For instance, whether we consider capital punishment morally tolerable or morally repugnant, we should be interested to learn whether having execution as a possible judicial sentence does or does not tend to deter murderers from their heinous crimes. 

Maybe we would learn conclusively that capital punishment does work as a deterrent.   Maybe we would learn than it does not serve as a deterrent.  But, either way, such a fact would be worth considering in forming our moral judgement.

Another thing to be brought to the discussion about a moral issue - I'm tempted to think the most important thing - is the question of consistency with our other moral principles. 

Complex moral questions often involve prioritizing what's at stake in a certain situation.  Maintaining public safety, for example, is a good thing, even though it's good for practical rather than essentially moral reasons; but is it a high enough value to justify killing someone, as in capital punishment, when respecting others' right to live is an elemental moral value?  Is the virtue of punishing someone in proportion to her or his crime high enough to justify execution?  Regardless of what we eventually decide, these are issues that should be weighed for consistency in our value system.  Finally, let's say we know for sure it is good and moral to treat others as we would want to be treated ourselves, so can I honestly say that if I had betrayed my country, I would want to be executed for my treason?  If my morality were logically consistent, I would.

13

We can't know what's right and wrong from studying only the relevant facts.  We can't know for sure from learning the moral codes that have traditionally been accepted by others.  We might know the probable practical benefits and drawbacks from various feelings and behaviors from our own experience, our own observation, and our own reasoning.  But even all of these together (and other steps others may propose) will not guarantee that X is right and Y is wrong.  We have to decide that for ourselves, understanding that we would want others to make their own decisions.

And unlike my freshman classmate, we should always be aware that our moral decisions are not trivial (or "arbitrary"), despite their coming essentially from within, like our taste in pop music.

We cannot consider moral statements true, or false.  But we make moral choices all the time, daily and long-term.  Why, then, don't I adopt a strategy?  Why don"t I behave as though I knew the moral truths I need in order to live responsibly?

So, here's what I'm going to do.  From this point on, I will -

• Set a higher standard for myself than I would judge others by
• Treat others as I want others to treat me
• Judge my actions and those of others on moral values consistent with my other moral values
• Seek peace and prosperity, equal opportunity, liberty and justice for all
• Respect others' opinions even when I disagree with them
• Avoid any attempt to impose on others my values or my world view
• Not deny to others things I want for myself
• Tell the truth (except in those few instances when to do so would be contrary to other essential values)
• Work against any attempt to profit from the suffering of others
• Take responsibility for my actions
• Do what I say I will do, or explain why
• Not treat those different from me as though, by being different, they were inferior
• Support political leaders who believe they should work together with others to serve the general social good, and
• Add to this list, never considering it complete or finished.

***

**

*

Can Moral Statements Be True? Part One [essay]

*

**

***

What does it tell us about our culture that facts we can know by experience and experimentation mean more to us than morality?  I'm afraid we care more about being correct than about being right...

1

I remember in sixth grade in Texas, when Mrs. Davis and the other sixth grade teacher invited a well-known Baptist, hellfire-and-brimstone preacher to talk with both the two classes in that grade sitting all together in one room. (It was a little crowded.)  This was during the 1953-54 year, if I'm counting correctly.

Frankly, I don't remember what Dr. Blake Smith said to us in his formal presentation, though it must have included references to the Bible. But I remember his follow-up question-and-answer period very well.

We all thought of a certain Richard as the smartest kid we knew.  So it wasn't surprising when, being invited to ask questions, without hesitation Richard raised his hand. 

He asked Dr. Smith, "How do I know the Bible is true?"

Even at that time that seemed an odd, but enormous question.  From our perspective today, it seems like it would have been a dangerous one too, or at least a volatile issue.

But this fiery Baptist preacher gave an excellent answer:

"It depends," he said, "on what you mean by 'true'."  And he went on to say some things about various meanings of "truth," which I found pretty interesting to think about. 

I could be kidding myself from this almost-60 year distance, but I think Dr. Smith did say that all statements in the Bible might not have been "true" the way a statement like "In the summer Texas is hot" is true. But the statements in the Bible were true, he said, in one or more other ways.

In this piece, I'm definitely not interested in the Bible but in what it means to say X or Y is right or wrong (or good or bad).  Can such a statement be true?  That would seem to be an important question.

2

And, by the way, here's another relevant memory:

...In my college freshman literature class (in the Midwest) was a guy who always wore rumpled camouflage pants - with all those pockets on the legs - with a dark-colored tee shirt and a heavy, old green jacket.  He had long, straggly hair and usually hadn't recently shaved. 

We often  had the opportunity to discuss the deep moral issues great literature raises.  Our instructor was well known for two things: he was hard to please, and - a Classics professor by training - he taught by the Socratic method, asking leading questions as a way to help us reach what he considered the correct conclusions.  He did that brilliantly.

Dr. Hornsby also made sure everyone in class participated, calling on specific individuals to answer his questions, whether a hand was raised or not.  (By the way, after I spoke on occasion, he looked me over sadly and said, "Mr. 'Derrick,' that will not do," shaking his head.)

All of us in the class got used to the fact that when called upon, this scraggly-haired guy (who reminded us regularly that he was an atheist and a Marxist) started every answer he gave to the instructor's questions the same way.  He invariably said: "Well, you know, you have to make an arbitrary value judgement..."

He was evidently in the process of internalizing the notion that no moral statement is based on fact.  Morality has to be invented by the individual from whole cloth.  Then, she or he will be really and personally responsible for living up to the standards thus arbitrarily created. 

I later learned to recognize this as an "Existential" position.  It is plausible, we should acknowledge, even though this fellow himself may have been a primarily comic figure.

3

So, the question is:  Can a moral statement be true?  When we say, for instance, "Profiting from the suffering of others is immoral," is our statement true-or-false... or something else?

Or was my classmate in 1960 correct to say that this kind of statement - like "One person should not seek to impose her or his values on others" - is based solely on the will of the individual who chooses to base her or his behavior on it?

4

It seems clear that none of the following moral statements can be proven false or true by scientific investigation:

• Profiting from the suffering of others is immoral
• One person should not seek to impose his or her values on others
• Treating others as you would want others to treat you is good
• Failing to abide by agreements you have made voluntarily is bad
• Providing for your family is the right thing to do
• Stealing someone else's property is wrong

...and so on, and so forth.

In other words, factual evidence does not exist to prove whether some action or intention or policy is moral or immoral, good or bad, right or wrong.  We can discover whether or not an action is or is not legal, but can we prove by investigation whether the law in question is or is not moral?  Until 1865, for example, slavery was legal in some of the United States, but most of us would say it was never moral, right?

We can also discover from evidence whether an action is efficient or inefficient, practical or impractical, hard or easy, satisfying or unfulfilling, even wise or unwise... but not whether it is right or wrong.

So, if by "true" we mean a statement can be proven or disproven by study of the facts, then moral statements - about what we should or should not do, or what is good or bad - cannot be "true."

 5

I suppose that if we had a "true" moral standard to which one action or another could be reliably compared, then maybe we might come up with moral statements that are themselves true.

Here are several other moral statements:

• To kill is forbidden
• To commit adultery is prohibited
• Taking for yourself another persons' property is taboo
• Lying about another person's actions is proscribed

These forbidden actions are stated, of course, in the well-known Judeao-Christian "Ten Commandments."  They are said to have come directly from an almighty God.  If such divine laws are sure to be "true," then a moral statement derived from them - such as, "To frame someone else for a crime you committed yourself is immoral" - would also be "true," wouldn't it?  If the moral standard were true, the laws or rules derived from it would also be true...

But, well, then, we have to admit that there are other people who believe in a different almighty God (or Gods), whose so-called true standards (or commandments) might be different from these.  If a statement is true, it cannot be contradicted by another "true statement," can it?  No.  So such moral standards themselves are no "truer" than the kind of everyday moral statements we started with, like these -

• Failing to abide by agreements you have made voluntarily is immoral
• Treating others fairly is moral
• Telling the truth is right
• Profiting from the suffering of others is wrong
• Kindness to others is good
• Greed is bad
• You should not take credit for the accomplishments of others
• You should take responsibility for your own actions

...and so on, and so forth.

6 (to be continued)

We'll continue this thought process in Part Two...

***

**

*

Either/Or Thinkers [essay]

* 

**

***

"One and One Makes Nothing: Dualism Equals Nihilism"

Some personal reflections:

1

When a guy walks down the narrow hall looking for a public restroom and sees two doors facing one another in a small alcove, one of which is marked "Women," he goes through the other door. He doesn't look to see if that door is marked "Men." It's the only remaining option.

(I presume it would be comparable for a woman, but from experience alone I can't be sure.)

Some people in our world - evidently a lot of them - see all of life that way.

For such people, there are only two possibilities. Everything either is or is not something or other; everything either has or does not have Quality X or Quality Y. While I myself am not, I believe, this kind of dualistic thinker, I respect them. I have a growing respect for their numbers. And I think I even understand where they're coming from.

2

Even dualistic thinkers do in fact recognize that some qualities exist in degrees, falling at some point between the one extreme and the other. A person is not necessarily tall or short, for instance; she or he may be "average" (probably meaning, the same height as "me"). The sky may be cloudy or clear, or it may be be partly cloudy; everybody knows that.

Despite the over-used metaphor often applied to dualistic people - namely, "For them, everything is either black or white" - they in fact do recognize that in questions of color, there are shades of gray: dark, light, or "medium" gray, perhaps even finer distinctions ("medium-dark"? "grayish"?). And in relation to skin color - or rather race - the folks I am describing do most often recognize, in our times, that one is not simply white or non-white; one may also be mixed race, even mixed-race in varying degrees. (I myself am apparently something like 0.15% Native American, for instance.)

But for most things, these many friends, family members, co-workers, neighbors, political leaders and followers, voters and non-voters... all these dualistic thinkers see things as either this or that:

• You are either my friend or my enemy.
• You're either with me or against me.
• One's answer to a question is either correct or incorrect.
• You are either a person of principle, or you sometimes change your mind even on important issues
• The bathroom light is either on or off.
• You either win or you lose.
• What you say is either true or false, and what you think is either right or wrong.
• You either succeed or you fail.
• You believe, or you are a non-believer.
• You fight or you flee.

 (And so on.)

3

And about moral distinctions in particular, these dualistic-minded folks are peculiarly definitive in applying the "either-this-or-that" method to their daily lives.

 In life, they find either:

   1. truth or lies (usually found in "packs"),

  2. justice or injustice,

  3. patriotism or treason,

  4. dignity or humiliation,

  5. honor or dishonor, and

  6. people who are either:

      a. loyal or disloyal,

      b. free or enslaved,

      c. moral or immoral,

      d. right or wrong,

      e. good or bad.

As surely as we know that the sky might be partly cloudy, everybody also knows that our world is decidedly not simply good. It must necessarily be bad, then, right?

So - in their heart of hearts, dualistics know that:

• Life is basically simple, either one thing or its opposite.
• Everybody is probably your enemy.
• Although some things may seem okay, they are probably really inadequate
• The powerful are out to get you. 
• Most people are losers, "lazy good-for-nothings."
• Big words and long sentences are intended to hide the simple truth,
• Everybody lies and swindles and cheats.
• Although what you do, most of the time, is good, what most other people do, most of the time, is bad.
• You have to keep your guard up
• It's - as we say - "Every man for himself."

4

Okay.  So -

If you're surrounded by enemies, you doubt anyone's apparently good intentions.

If  everyone's a crook, you have to get your own as fast as you can.

If most people are losers, you have to be better than anyone else you see.

If everyone lies, you must question what anyone tells you.

If everyone cheats, the rules don't matter.

If the powerful are out to put you under their control, you must stand up to them and fight for your freedom and dignity.

If you can't depend on anyone or anything, you must vigorously protect yourself with an iron discipline.

5

As the result of perceiving the world this way, the either-or-way, these many people - rich and poor, southern and northern and western and eastern, educated and uneducated, urban and rural, sophosticated and rough-and-ready, upper class and working class - these dualistic thinkers throughout their whole lives are:

• persistent and consistent,
• independent,
• impatient with complex questions or explanations,
• unforgiving and uncompromising,
• angry,
• courageous,
• defensive,
• focused on the present, rather than on historical trends or future probabilities,
• passionate,
• suspicious,
• combative or aggressive,
• fierce,
• proud,
• intolerant of uncertainty and opposing opinions,
• fearful,
• prone to violence,
• lonely or "loner-ly."

As they see it and live it, the world is hostile, undependable, immoral, and seductive. They may recognize that it shouldn't and probably needn't be that way, but they know it is.

So - as they see it, a person should consider himself or herself morally superior to the world around her or him, but powerless to fundamentally change things. Such a person can never be satisfied or relax and must be ever-vigilant against the immorality of other people and the uncertainties of an evil world.

*

**

***

Mr. Tzigitti Got Married [reminiscence]

***

Deep in the dusty old musty ledgers of France's archives are two of my signatures, on two different marriage records.  I was a witness twice to marriages in France, once in 1970 in a small village south of LeMans and once before that in 1963 in Paris.

1

When I was in graduate school in the East, the guy I spent most of my free time with, coincidentally,  had spent in Germany the year I had spent in Paris as my JYA.  When I moved west to finish up my graduate studies, we didn't correspond.  Not once.  But anyway, something motivated me to drop him a note in spring 1969, three years after we had last seen each other, to say that I was going back to Europe the coming fall, this time on Fulbright work to Lyon.

He wrote back immediately, to say he was going back to Germany too!  That fall he met a French young woman in his Goethe Institute.  I visited them later in Tubingen, then again at her family home near LeMans, France, where they were eventually married.

In France, all marriages are civil, in a public magistrate's office.  Even if there is a church ceremony too - as there was in the French village - there has to be a civil ceremony first.  It seemed natural for me to be the formal witness for my American friend.

2

But that was my second witnessing experience.

I can't recall how, in the Spring of 1963,  I first met an American named Jim, who had gone to France with a young woman he said was his wife so that she could work as an au pair and he could learn French.  He was taking courses at the Alliance Francaise, and he and his wife lived high up in a garret room above the flat of her employer, a Hungarian political refugee named Tzigitti.

Jim was at least a couple of years older than I, but he seemed to like my company.  We had a coffee together now and then, spent some park bench time once in a while.  I visited his room a couple of times and of course met his wife.  She told me she was gaining experience in France so that she could be a private French tutor for rich British or American families.  Jim and she introduced me also to Mr. Tzigitti.

He was an odd duck, maybe 60 years old, real skinny.  He rarely shaved or brushed his longish hair, both his hair and his beard having quite a few streaks of gray.  He seemed to like having people to talk to, and he enjoyed listening to himself a lot.  He was energetic, nervous even, and spoke and laughed loud, very loud.  Dropping in to say Hello, as I did two or three times, would take the better part of an hour.

He probably didn't think his American au pair was worth his time and humor and wisdom... since she was female (he seemed old school in that sense), and Jim's French wasn't very good.  That's why I thought he liked to talk with, or to, me so much.  Jim seemed to take it as relief.

3

Jim and I spent a long weekend that spring hitchhiking to Strasbourg and just over the border in Germany.  Coming back, we spent a night in Metz (promounced "mess") with some distant relatives of his.  This was where I discovered that in France, on tv American wrestling was popular.  There was an old guy in the Metz apartment who spent the whole evening laughing and cheering and shouting at the matches on a little tv in their tiny living room, where eventually the woman of the family made pallets of blankets on the floor where Jim and I could sleep.

Jim told me sometime after we had returned to Paris that Mr. Tzigitti had abruptly announced one night that he was going to get married.  He had apparently had quite an active sex life, and had women visitors over several different nights each week.  Two or three of them were regulars, who would spend the night.  Naturally, the maid (Jim's wife) knew all this well.

Mr. Tzigitti had spoken to Jim about it too, referring to a ranking system he had.  There was Mistress #1, Mistress #2, and Mistress #3.  I believe there were some incidentals now and again as well.

So it was a little surprising when Mr. Tzigitti announced he was getting married.  Jim was skeptical, but his wife thought it would happen.  It was also surprising that he was going to marry "his second mistress, Anne."

4

We had a few laughs about it.  But after a week or two Mr. Tzigitti invited us to his wedding luncheon.  And he asked me if I would be his witness.

Again, I figured he didn't think Jim's language skills were up to it, and he wouldn't have asked his au pair.  So, one warm and sunny spring morning on the right bank in Paris, I met Mr. Tzigitti outside a district City Hall.  He was clean-shaven and nicely dressed, but was still not what you would call an imposing figure.  When we went inside, he introduced me to his bride, whom he called his second mistress Anne.  Yes, and she seemed really happy (maybe because she had beaten out #1).

Anne was probably in her 40s.  She was a gorgeous red-head with lots of thick wavy hair about shoulder length.  She was wearing a solid colored dress, cut just above the knee, of a pretty shade of orange.  She had a little bouquet of spring flowers, and she pinned a little boutonniere on Mr. Tzigitti's lapel.  With her was a woman friend (whom I don't remember) who would obviously be her witness.



The lady arranged us, with me at the left corner of the desk, Mr. Tzigitti in the center with Anne on his right, and with the other witness at the right corner.  When we were all set, the magistrate rose and greeted us, and the brief little ceremony took place.  The groom and bride did exchange rings, but I don't remember if they kissed.  Probably so.

Immediately afterward, the magistrate turned the big book around and showed Mr. Tzigitti first, and then Anne where to sign their names with the ink pen he gave them.  The greeter lady told him I was an American and gave him my passport.  He wrote my name and passport information and showed me where to sign, and then had the final witness sign last.  Apparently, he'd had the i-d information about the other three beforehand.

5

It was just a few blocks from the district hotel de ville to the posh restaurant on the Champs-Elysees where Mr. Tzigitti had decided to hold his wedding luncheon.  We met Jim and his wife there.  So it was a blessedly small party for the meal: bride and groom, the two witnesses, au pair and husband.  Still, it seemed an extravagant expense for a man who lived as modestly as Mr. Tzigitti, even if its purpose was to commemorate his marriage to his second-best mistress.

It was overly warm, and none of us really needed that much food or wine.  But it was very nice to have been invited.

***

Wise Sayings 10 from Ron Lucius

***

Variations on the Classics

I can't stand a house divided.

……………………………………………………….................Ron Lucius

*

Absolutes are bad

Relatives are tedious

……………………………………………………….................Ron Lucius

*

"All or nothing"?
or
"Nothing or anything"?

("Something or nothing"?)

……………………………………………………….................Ron Lucius

*

An unexamined life is not worth forgiving

……………………………………………………….................Ron Lucius

*

Moderation in all things, including moderation


……………………………………………………….................Ron Lucius

*

It may be better to be right than wrong,

     but
it's better to be kind than right.

……………………………………………………….................Ron Lucius

*

Half a loaf is a pretty good meal

……………………………………………………….................Ron Lucius

*

"Love yourself, and know your enemies"?
or
"Love your enemies, and know yourself"?

……………………………………………………….................Ron Lucius

***

 

My 45s Collection, Part Three (of Three)

***

In the first two parts of this reminiscence, I listed several different groups of my records that have been sleeping in a cabinet in our den for a couple of decades.  I have a couple of groups left to survey.

1

All right, I’ll admit it: the next stack of 45s includes some embarrassments. I just can't have collected all these myself, can I? Some may have been my wife's. Others may have been - gulp - my sister's. Well, at least this group does include some of the most familiar pop hits of the late fifties.

Tammy   by The Ames Brothers

                      with Joe Reisman’s Orchestra and Chorus

Young Love   by Tab Hunter

                                with the Billy Vaughan Orchestra

Heart of My Heart   by The Four Aces

                                                featuring Al Alberts

Speak Low (Tout Bas)   by The Blue Stars

Soft Summer Breeze   by Eddie Heywood

My Bonnie Lassie   by The Ames Brothers

                             with the Hugo Winterhalter Orchestra

I’ll Never Stop Loving You   by Doris Day

                                          with the Percy Faith Orchestra

Tonight You Belong to Me   by The Ames Brothers

                           with the Hugo Winterhalter Orchestra

Eh, Cumpari   by Julius LaRosa

                                    with the Archie Bleyer Orchestra

Cherry Pink and Apple Blossom White

                                        by the Perez Prado Orchestra

It’s Not for Me to Say   by Johnny Mathis

                                      with the Ray Conniff Orchestra

If You Believe   by Johnnie Ray

                                     with the Percy Faith Orchestra

Many Times   by Bud Roman

                                   with the Lee Raymond Orchestra

Young at Heart   by Frankie Carle

The Man With the Golden Arm   by Elmer Bernstein

                                                            and his Orchestra

My Truly, Truly Fair   by Ray Anthony

                                                     and his Orchestra

Flip, Flop, and Fly   by Johnnie Ray

                                   with the Les Elgart Orchestra

Time   by the Jackie Gleason Orchestra

Manhattan Spiritual  by the Reg Owen Orchestra

The Trouble With Harry   by Alfi and Harry

Who Needs You   by The Four Lads

Play Me Hearts and Flowers   by Johnny Desmond

Most of these records don’t really seem to reflect my taste, then or now… But this is history, right?

2

I suppose those who look carefully through all the records listed so far - in Parts One, Two, and Three - could pick out a few that might be termed “Country and Western” (like Webb Pierce singing “The Honky Tonk Song” that’s in the brown box and Rusty Howard’s “Mexican Joe” in Part Two).  I did use to like listening to “Western Cavalcade” on KVET 1300 in the evening doing my Latin homework.  But by and large I didn’t actually buy Country and Western records.

I did buy four, though, which I still have but have not yet mentioned.  I am particularly proud of the last one.

Cool Water   by The Sons of the Pioneers

Shadows on the Old Bayou   by Johnny Horton

                                                          and the Texans

Red River Valley   by The Sons of the Pioneers

and

Chew Tobacco Rag   by Pee Wee King

                                   and his Golden West Cowboys.

I can remember a few others that I don’t have anymore, including three little boxed sets of 45s:  one of show tunes (I remember Howard Keel’s picture on the front), one of square-dance music (I enjoyed square dancing from elementary right through high school), and one of Roy Rogers’ biggest hits.  Also, I regret having lost one record that would have appeared among the “also-rans” above: Guy Mitchell’s “I Never Felt More Like Singin’ the Blues.”

One final note:  In all these lists, I didn’t include the B side of these records.  They all have them, or course.  Some fans might have chosen differently than I, but I chose the side I listened to most often, as far as I can remember. 

There are 160 records altogether.

***

My 45s Collection, Part Two (of Three)

***

In Part One of this Reminiscence, I listed the first two groups of records in my 45s collection from 1955-60 which at one time seemed to have been my favorites.  First, I kept forty-five 45s in a little brown box that I could take with me to my friends’ houses; I listed the current contents.  Second, I listed a group of “slow tunes” that I admitted I listen to more now than to the R & B and pop tunes in the boxed collection.

1

Next in my cabinet is another group of “slow tunes” that I guess didn't make the first cut. There are a couple of surprises even for me among these records, but I simply must have bought all of them in the first place and later I must even have considered putting them in the "favorite slow tunes" stack…

Anyway, here are the "also-ran" slow tunes:

My Heart Stood Still   by The Four Freshmen

If I Give My Heart to You   by Doris Day

                                                        and The Mellomen

No, Not Much   by The Four Lads

                                             with the Roy Ennis Orchestra

Memories Are Made of This   by Gale Storm

It’s Almost Tomorrow   by Jo Stafford

                                         with the Paul Weston Orchestra

Love Is a Many-Splendored Thing   by Don Cornell

Fools Will Be Fools   by The Four Preps

My Desire   by The Cliques

Teach Me Tonight   by Jo Stafford

                                      with the Paul Weston Orchestra

Tell Me, Tell Me   by June Valli

Forgive My Heart   by Nat “King” Cole

A Story Untold   by The Crew-Cuts

Picnic   by The McGuire Sisters

All the Time   by Johnny Mathis

                                           with the Ray Ellis Orchestra

Until the Day I Die   by The Teen Queens

The End   by Earl Grant

Love Is a Many-Splendored Thing   by the Four Aces

                                                          featuring Al Alberts.

2

Oh my! Yes, there are actually still lots more 45s, in separate stacks, for some reason. The first two records in this next bunch are unusual. The first is by a girl in the high school class ahead of me. It was her second (and, I believe, last) commercially produced recording, following one released by the local group "The Four Roses." These kids performed around town for a time as "Joyce Webb and the Four Roses." The second record here - “Pet Cream Man” - I haven't listened to in a long time. I think I bought it when I was sixteen or so, thinking it might be one of what we in the racially divided South imagined were sexually suggestive "black" tunes (like “Switchie Witchie…” in the box). Mainly it's just not very good, if I am remembering correctly.

Not all the records in this particular stack were my own…including the first four, I promise! It will perhaps be obvious that the records in this stack, unlike the ones above, are not in order of which the first ones are the best. Even Chuck Miller's "Bye, Bye, Love" (last in this list) is probably not the worst record in the group.

Ain’t That Just Like a Man   by Joyce Webb

Pet Cream Man   by J. B. and His Hawks

Long Tall Sally   by (gasp) Pat Boone “with orchestra”

I Almost Lost My Mind   by Pat Boone “with orchestra”

Ain’t That a Shame   by Pat Boone “with orchestra”

Tutti-Frutti   by Pat Boone “with orchestra”

Nola   by Guy Lombardo and His Royal Canadiens

The Sand Dance   by Guy Lombardo and His Royal Canadiens

Ricochet   by Guy Lombardo and His Royal Canadiens

That’s Amore   by Bud Roman

                                  with Lee Raymond’s Orchestra

The Eagle and the Bear   by Jimmie Flagg

The Man with the Banjo   by Bud Roman

     with The Four Rhythmaires, and Lee Raymond’s Orchestra

Tribute to Hank Williams   by Joe Rumore

                      with J. T. Adams and The Men of Texas

Tain’t Nice   by Bill Carlisle and The Carlyles

A Full Time Job   by the Rhythm Rangers

                                            with Rusty Howard

Shake a Hand   by Rusty Howard

                                  and the Rhythm Rangers

Mexican Joe   by Rusty Howard

                                   and The Texas Playboys

Caribbean   by Rusty Howard

                                    and the Rhythm Rangers

Lazy River   by Roberta Sherwood

Because You’re Mine   by Hal Ross

                                          and the Les Morgan Orchestra

In Jerusalem (“sung in English”)   by Jane Morgan

                 with the Joe Sherman Orchestra and Chorus

My Screamin’ Screamin’ Mimi   by Ray Campi

Bye, Bye, Love   by Chuck Miller

                                          with the Earl Stevens Orchestra.

In many cases in this group, the names of both the singer and the orchestra are not familiar. I may be one of the few who do recognize "The Texas Playboys," however.

3

The next stack seems to be a continuation of the records I might have considered taking in my little brown box to a party... but didn't, more often than not. These records also still sound pretty good to me:

Steam Heat   by Patti Page

                                and the Jack Rael Orchestra

Let’s Write Our Own Love Story   by The Four Lads

                                             with Ray Conniff’s Orchestra

Day by Day   by The Four Freshman

                                     with the Dick Reynolds Orchestra

Rollin’ Stone  by The Fontane Sisters

                                        and the Billy Vaughan Orchestra

I Must Be Dreaming  by The Hilltoppers

                                       featuring Jimmie Sacca

Most of All   by Don Cornell

Could This Be Magic?   By The Dubs

Have Mercy Baby   by Ella Mae Morse

                               with Big Dave and His Orchestra

Blue Star   by Charlie Applethwaite

                                              and the Victor Young Orchestra

49 Shades of Green   by The Ames Brothers

                                        with the Hugo Winterhalter Orchestra

Why Do Fools Fall in Love   by Gale Storm

Something’s Gotta Give   by The McGuire Sisters

Mostly Martha   by The Crew-Cuts

Nothing Ever Changes My Love for You   by Nat “King" Cole

                                              with Nelson Riddle’s Orchestra

Teen-Ager’s Crush   by Tommy Sands

You’re Mine   by The Dream Weavers

                                    featuring Wade Buff

A Teenager’s Romance   by Rick Nelson

                                              with Barney Kessell’s Orchestra

It’s Only the Good Times   by Tommy Edwards

                         with the LeRoy Holmes Orchestra and Chorus

It Isn’t Right   by The Platters

I Love My Girl   by The Hilltoppers

                                                featuring Jimmie Sacca

Love Me to Pieces   by Jill Corey

                             with the Jimmy Carroll Orchestra

Cry   by Johnny Ray and The Four Lads

Young Love   by The Crew-Cuts

                              with the David Carroll Orchestra

Let Me Go, Lover   by Theresa Brewer

                                            with the Lancers

My nominee for the worst lyric in this whole collection, including the B sides, is: “Blue Star, when I am blue/All I do/Is think of you.”  And why do some labels list the orchestra but others do not?  And did anyone remember that Johnny Ray’s smash hit “Cry” included The Four Lads?

There's a Part Three still to come!

***